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"What a ragging sir ji !" - Session 4

          Again a friday, and this time, the seniors had ordered us do one more thing...

"Idha paarunga, hereafter daily you guys should get us two lays packets, ok ?"
"Daily ah ?", I thought this was too much for a senior to, actually, beg, according to me. "What the...Na daily-laam kashtam..."
"Enna kashtam ? Naanga senjom, so neengalum seyyanum. Take turns and buy for us, otherwise...", he paused for a moment."..........", and he didn't say anything further.
"Edhukku vambu", we thought. "Ok na, we will buy"

          In Bus 30, anything the seniors wanted to convey to the freshers, they would call me first, and this time too. As I was told this matter first, I decided to get lays for them that day. So I went to the canteen, got what they asked, and I bought a lemon soda for me.

          While walking towards the bus and simultaneously drinking that 10 rupee soda thinking that I'm doing something stylish before the pigars, I saw my ragging mate outside,leaning on the bus and texting to someone. I went near her.

"Um, hi", she replied without taking her eyes off her mobile.
"Hey I wanna tell you one thing"
"Um", I mimicked, and she looked at me.
"Now thats better", I told her while sipping the soda."Hoping that they won't rag us today huh ?"
"Um, yea, lets see"

"Um, um ! Theraadha case", I thought. The girl who sang "pettai rap" in English was standing next to her.
"Hei what a presence of mind dude ! One rupee two rupee breaking the piggy bank..."
"Heh heh, thank you Vishnu. And ***** sang Baba black sheep well too !"
She took her eyes off her mobile once again and smiled at us. I thought this girl was at least, talking. But...

She continued, "You know ? When I was a kid I used to think 'baba black sheep have you any balls' and...."

          PSHIRRCH ! I spat my lime soda down, and looked at her with what-the-f**k expression, "hei ! Ennaya idhu ?"
"what ? Did I say anything wrong ?"
"Aala vidra saami", I went inside the bus.

"Vaanga Vishnu !", the seniors greeted.
"Yea hi na, indhaanga",I gave them the packets.
"Good", one anna said. "Hope we get it daily"
"I too, err, hope", I replied, and before anyone could say something for that, I came to my seat, ear-phoned, and closed my eyes.


          After what seemed to be ages, I was woken up by a girl (my stop only :-P But not my ragging mate), as usual.
"Pch", I sighed.
"Vishnu fast"
"Yea yea, wait I'll come", I looked around, and got stunned. "What the...", we hadn't even crossed Kelambakkam ! So I'm gonna be ragged for one and a half hour ! Thats too much time for ragging, even at
IIT's and NIT's.

          I went back. The seniors were giggling, "Enna machaan innikku SSN salute vechukkalaamaa ?"
"Enna na koopteengalaa ?"
"Vaa Vishnu, enna thoongitrundhiyaa ?"
"Illa na flight ottitrundhen", I mokkied.
"Seri ippa vaa, ivala ottu"
"What ?"
"Ivala rag pannu", he corrected.

          Well, I'm always against ragging you know ? I've decided that I won't rag anyone when I become a senior.
"Illanaa rag laam panna sollaadheenga", I said.
"Dei, pannudaa", he insisted.
"Illanaa please venaam", I err, resisted back :-P
"Machaan ivana ennadaa pannalaam ?", he asked another anna.
"Seri nee vaa, inga nillu", the other anna said.
"OMG, idhu enna suspense", I thought.

          I stood in the middle of those seniors, and was thinking how worse the ragging would be this time.

"Now, listen", one anna told. "You are the India map, ok ? Stand with both your hands stretched sideways..."
"Ayyayo anna please", I pleaded. "Andha ponnu paakkudhu na"
"Aamaa ivuru periya manmadhakkk...", he paused again for a moment."Nilludaa..."
"Hmmm", I stood the way I was told to.
"Enna manasula Dicaprio-nu nenappaa ? Kaiya ozhunga vaida"
"Seri seri, vechaachu", it was very embarrassing to stand like Jesus Christ inside the 60 kmph speeding bus, with one pretty girl watching me getting embarrassed :-P

"Ok, now...", one anna instructed her. "Tell any place on India, and Vishnu, in that place, Earthquake must occur !"
I got what he meant ! Nothing much, she'll tell a place and I've to shake the corresponding part of my body ! Noooo, never !
"Na ! na enna na idhu ? please ennaala shake laam panna mudiyaadhu !", I pleaded again.
"Appa vera enna pannuviyaam ?", one anna winked."Solradha seyyanum, ok ?"
"Hmmm, seththaen", I thought. "Yemmaa ! Konjam places paathu sollumaa !"
"What ?"
"Enna what ? Tamil theriyaadhaa ?"
"I'm sorry ?"
"Sorry, I'm from Andhra..."
"WWHATT ??", I was shocked ! Well, you know the reason :-P This is it. "pochu :-(", I thought.

"Hmmm, come on, tell any place", one anna said.
"Hmmm, Gujarat ?"
I stood still.
"Enna da Earthquake enga ?"
"Na pavam na Gujarat", I mokkied again.
"Paravaalla Vishnu, Modi doesn't mind"

          I shook my right arm up and down, like I was having epilepsy. Just visualize the picture how it'll be, me vibrating my hand in a bus with 5 to 6 people staring at me ! Who knows how many saw that from outside...

"Ok next", one anna told her.
"Anna podhum na"
"Adhukkullaa ya ? Thambi !"
"Jammu & Kashmir !", she told.
"Hey are you enjoying it ?", I shouted at her furiously. But no, I realised that she too was doing that on compulsion. I shook my head left and right.

          The same thing went on for 10 minutes.
"Delhi" (Anna's were having a great time at this point :-P)
"Madhya Pradesh !" (Heheh ! Stomach fellas !)

"Hei !", one anna interrupted."Tell a place from your state !"
"ANNA !", I shouted.
"Nee sollu ma"
"What ?"
"Continue", another one translated.
"Hmmm, hyderabad ?"
"Ang ok hyderabad", One anna nodded his head. "Vishnoo, Hyderabad enga irukku ?"
"En kaalla", I replied.
"Are you surreee... ?", he winked.
"I shaked my thighs without replying. I was getting hurt, honestly !
"Next ?"
"Tirupati ?"
"wowowowow ! Tirupati !"
"Angadhaan malai irukku !", one anna told, and series of laughter filled the entire bus.
"Annaaaaa", I was like begging. "Anna please please please please...Oh my God ! Hey ***** don't see, turn around !"
"Seri seri azhuvaadha...podhum", one anna said. "Indha figure epdi irukku ?"

"Habbaadi ! Its my time now !", I got relieved slightly. The bus was now at Kotturpuram.
"Hmmm, not bad na, hair ok, broad forehead, eyes are talking ! and..."
"Dei dei, niruthu da", one anna interrupted. "Epdi irukku-nu dhaane kaettom ? Apdiyae varnikkira ?"
"Illa na oru flow-la...", I became excited after I crossed the map-u aappu.  

"Nee describe panni kilichadhu podhum, ippa ivala thittu"
"Eh ?", the bus was only metres away now from my stop.
"Ivala ketta ketta vaarthaila thittanum..."
"Anna adhellaam 10th-liyae vittaachu na", I replied.
"Dei nadikkaadha da !"
"Saththiya ma ! Ippalaam pesaradhilla", I spoke the truth.
"Adhellaam kedaiyaadhu, ippa nee thittalaenna you can't get down !"
"Enna ezhavu da idhu !", I sighed. The bus came to a halt !
" Ading....Oth* thae***** lava******* punn*** Ssssooooo..."

"Dei dei dei !!!", all those annas got shocked and horrified and petrified and andha-fied and indha-fied...
"Dei, N..Nee kelambu, we'll talk on monday about this !"
"ok na", and I got down and the bus left us behind.

"Hey *******, I'm sorry", I told her. I really felt bad.
"Its ok", she said. "But for what ?"
"For what huh ? You know what I said inside the bus !"
"Well, what did you say ? It was me who was hurting you all the way ! I'm sorry"
"Eh ?", I thought for a moment. "Oh yea ! U don't get Tamil right ?"
"I told I don't", she snapped back. "By the way Vishnu, what were you telling there ?"
"Err",I replied with a grin. "Well, just recalling things !" :-)

"What a ragging sir ji !" - Session 1
"What a ragging sir ji !" - Session 2
"What a ragging sir ji !" - Session 3
"What a ragging sir ji !" - Session 4
"What a ragging sir ji !" - Session 5
"What a ragging sir ji !" - Session 6


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